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By Bryan | January 26, 2010
On August 1, six seemingly short years ago, Jen and I said I do and we were ready to celebrate our newly announced love in Jamaica.
We woke up the next day at 4 in the morning and arrived at Cleveland airport. On arrival we checked in our bags at the ticket check -in counter, and from there we would not see our baggage until we arrived at our tropical paradise.
Throughout the flight from Cleveland to Miami and then to Jamaica, we were doing what most newlyweds do the day or two after their wedding, SLEEP. On landing we were directed to walk down a ladder. That’s right you read correctly a ladder, I was used to going through a tunnel but in our new tropical paradise a ladder would have to do. When we walked into the terminal I started looking for the baggage claim, but I did not find one, so I found a terminal assistant and asked where my baggage was located. His response, “Ah man no worry be happy, they are over there.” he pointed to a dirt floor with hundreds of bags scattered, tossed and tagged out in the open.
As I recall this moment I can’t help but relate that too many of our lives. We have baggage (emotional, physical, spiritual) that for many of us have been scattered, tossed and tagged throughout our life’s journey. And for some of you it has ruined your honeymoon, you have done what many honeymooners do: Ignore the obvious. Let me challenge you to face the reality of your situation.
That day in the Airport terminal no one was going to pick up my bags for me that was my responsibility. I had to find them and pick them up because if I didn’t I would never have arrived at my destination.
I was told that my bags were in the terminal that is all I knew. For many of you God has revealed your baggage but you have let it sit in the terminal, not dealt with and ignored. It’s your responsibility to pick them up, but this is where it gets good.
After I picked up my bags I still was not at my destination. I found a man who came as a representative of our resort and asked me if I would allow him to help me carry my baggage. I gave him my baggage but it came with a price. Not knowing that I forgot to separate my smaller bills from my bigger ones, I gave him a twenty. He only took my bags about 30 steps, but I didn’t care my bags were handled and I was on my way.
Today let me be a representative and challenge you to give your bags to the One who can help you carry them. The One who can heal your broken heart, forgive a past that is checkered with pain and regret, and restore that which was lost. Of course it will come with a price: 1) you have to locate your baggage 2) you have to be honest about your baggage and 3) you have to give them to the One who will get you to your destination.
Needless to say that though our honeymoon got off to a rough and stressful start, it did not end that way.
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By Bryan | November 30, 2009
I Hate Spandex (definition: Spandex, or elastane, is a synthetic fiber known for its exceptional Cling factor) and I blame the 80’s Glam Rock era for introducing us to a fabric that far too many have deceived themselves into thinking they could wear it and look good in it; I am included in that being I thought I could pull that style off. (I blame Bon Jovi)
And we all know or have come in contact with Spandex –like people. Sure they may not actually wear the forbidden fabric, but they have many of its characteristics.
These people will cling to you, and cling tightly. They will grab onto you and not want to let go. It won’t feel right, look right and you should get it off. These are what we call overly needed people; those who have by their own bad choices are always clinging to you for a bailout. As I was thinking about this if we are not careful we can get a Spandex Complex.
How do we avoid the Spandex Complex?
Set healthy boundaries by allowing them to face their own consequences.
Consequences are a natural part of God’s system, and when helping people who are overly needy, as difficult as it may be, we must love them enough to allow them to face their consequences.
Look at scripture. Galatians 6:7-8,
You will reap what you sow
You can see a great example of this in Luke 15. The Bible calls it the parable of the Prodigal son. It’s actually a father who had two sons, and one of the sons said, “Dad, I don’t want to live your way anymore. Give me my share of the estate.” And this son went out, took his father’s wealth, and he blew it, partying hard. Well, his father was wise enough to let this son hit bottom, and when the son hit bottom and faced the consequences of his sinful behavior, the Bible says the son came to his senses and he thought to himself, “Hey, even my father’s servants have food, and here I am out dying because of these bad choices.” The consequences led him to the right decision, which was to go back to his father’s ways.
Rescuing isn’t always helping
Moms, dads, sometimes one of the most loving things that we can do is step back and say, “I don’t want to see you hurt, but if you make these choices, then you are going to have to go down that road on your own.” Rescuing isn’t always helping. Now, as soon as you don’t rescue someone who is overly needy, and you have rescued them in the past, the first thing they are going to do is say, “You don’t want me anymore. This isn’t fair. If you love me, you would’ve helped me.”
What my mom and dad did for me when I was a freshman in college was one of the most painful things that they ever did. Alcohol had been a, had caused a lot of pain in our family. And for whatever foolish reason, I thought I could handle alcohol. Well, I couldn’t, and so my parents said to me, “If you go down that road, you will go down it by yourself. We will no longer support you.” And they told me what that meant, and it basically meant that they wouldn’t support me, and so, I hit bottom. Hard. My wrong decisions, although fun for a season. Eventually, caught up and I lost my friends, reputation, resources. I crashed and hit bottom, and when I hit bottom, I had nowhere to turn, but up. And, not even sure if this whole Jesus thing was real, I called on the name of Jesus, and I’m telling you, in a moment’s time, the risen Christ touched me and changed me, and that’s why I believe with everything in me that sometimes, some people have to do it the hard way. They have to hit bottom so there’s nowhere else to turn but up, and when they turn up, He will be there for them.
I asked my mom, I said, “What was it like to watch me go down that road?” and she said, “Bryan, it was the hardest thing I ever did to know you were on a path to destruction, but you just wouldn’t learn any other way.” And they wisely stepped back, and prayed for me, and let me crash.
You see, rescuing isn’t always helping. Sometimes it is. Sometimes it’s not. It’s the tension. You have to be sensitive to the voice of the Spirit of God.
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By Bryan | October 12, 2009
Do You Love Your City ?
I want to take a few minutes to focus on the city.
We have according to most sociologist have entered into the century of the city.
In 1980 there were over 175 cities in the world with a population of 1,000,000 each.
In 1989 there were over 348 cities in the world with a population of 1,000,000 each.
In 2000 there were over 500 cities in the world with a population of 1,000,000 each.
Which shows us cities are growing exponentially, as a matter of fact the top 60 cities in the world collectively hold almost 1 billion people 1/6 of the planets population is presently contained in only 60 cities. We live in the century of the city. It was estimated that in the year 1900 only 1 in 20 lived in a city it is also projected that in the year 2020 3 out of 4 people will live in a city. This simply means the greatest mission field in our generation is found in the city. We love the city not just because the city offers diversity, or opportunity, we love the city because we know God loves the city and the reason God loves the city is because the city contains the greatest concentration of what God loves the most : PEOPLE. That is our assignment to redeem that which God loves , to restore what the enemy has laid claim too, to revitalize that which God desires to fulfill with His love. God’s passion is always found in the city and the bible shows us that principle time and time again. More then anything we should love our city because God loves our city, He set his love upon it and has assigned us to be here at this critical time in history so we can impact it, love it ,we can change it, you are here on assignment not by accident.
Do you love your city ?
If you love your city what does this mean for us practically:
1) We must take our cities into our hearts
If we look at our city as a place to be avoided and resented we will never change anything . This applies to anything; If you resent your job you will not be able to change it ;If you resent your marriage you will never receive the grace you need to nurse the marriage to health We never restore what we resent , and its only in loving our cities that we begin to include them in the great plan God has for them.
2)Approach the city with the faith that God can do something great
Ever feel powerless to change something in your life? Anytime you feel small like you can’t make an impact remember what it’s like going to bed with a mosquito in the room. Small irritant promote major actions and reactions. Even though we may feel insignificant powerless if we start right where we are, at your home, in your apartment, your university ,where you are living out your faith serving those around you it only takes a small step for God to use you in a big way.
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By Bryan | August 4, 2009
Guest Blogger: Jennifer Robles
Do you ever notice the time you go places and someone steps out of their way to open the door for the elderly, or assist someone with alot in their hands ? Maybe you seen someone drop things they were carrying and someone stopped to help pick them up. The list could go on and on. A broken down car, letting someone in front of you at the grocery store, giving someone that piece of gum when asked. When people help others it gets noticed and as Christians we must stop and ask ourself , ”are we doing our part ? ” Some religions believe that their good works will get them into heaven, and we know that this is not true (Ephesians 2:8-9). As a Christian I want to do these “so called good works” (aka. nice things) not because I have to but because I want to, and out of my love for God and my love for others. Matthew 5:16 says, “let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your father in heaven.” I think we need to reevaluate our good works mentality and be as dedicated to them as Christ was dedicated to serve others. Let’s start putting our love into action. In other words don’t let grace be an excuse for laziness !
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By Bryan | June 23, 2009
The year was 1991, it was a year that none of the 15 teenage players would forget. That was the year my father took 15 young boys and turned them into winners, who won the envied pony league trophy. The trophy we won was different than any other, because it represented something that had never happened before in the history of Fremont’s pony league. We were the only team to go undefeated, not only during regular season but also during our pony league series.
As I replayed those moments, as a pony league baseball player, I realized winning the trophy didn’t happen on accident. It started when the coach came in with a game plan. He cast a vision for the team, he told us it would be work and he worked us. The coach knew where we were going, he seen our potential and he made us believe it could happen, we could be winners.
Fathers you are our coaches.
What vision have you cast for your family?
(Proverbs 29:18)
What plan have you made for your marriage to be a trophy- esk type of marriage?
(Colossians 3:19)
Have you spoken into your children’s life, told them their potential and help develop it.?
(Ephesians 6:4)
Visionary coaches make all the difference.
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By Bryan | May 12, 2009
Let me start by saying: I have a spiritual superstar for a wife. I do not know how many times she has spoken into my life and has given me spiritual insight. Just recently Jen wrote down some Phat (to those who do not know what that means ask your teen) truths about walking.
Jen’s blog:
I must confess I am out of shape, so I decided to start walking with my dad whose a walking machine ! We walked a few miles the other day and I woke up to cramped legs and sore muscles, but just the day before he walked all the way to bellevue and back about a 20 mile walk and was fine.
I guess that’s why these verses popped out at me : Joshua 6:2-5 . These verses say that the children of Israel were to march around the city of Jericho seven times. Does any one else think , ” Wow that is alot, an entire city”, but I realized I was looking at this verse from an I AM SO OUT OF SHAPE mentalilty. These people were conditioned. The children of Israel had been walking in the wilderness for 40 years with the goal to get to the promised land and here they are right in the midst of it.
You know God has good things in store for His people. Right now may be a wilderness time where you feel like your wandering (walking) aimlessly, but let me encourage you to be working on those spiritual muscles.
If your following God, the wilderness will lead to the promise land and you’ll want to be ready and conditioned for the victory!
preperation time is never wasted time …
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By Bryan | April 3, 2009
Every once in awhile I come across a blog that Rocks my world and I thought I would share one with you:
If my generation isn’t careful, we may fall into a Guitar Hero mentality toward ministry:
Everybody wants to be a rock star, but no one wants to learn the chords.
It’s hard work to study God’s Word. To pray for breakthrough. To do spiritual battle on behalf of those we lead. To charge forward in faith for the cause of Christ. To run a church with the highest standard of excellence.
Aspiring ministers:
Be willing to pay the price. Or please go do something else with your life.
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By Bryan | February 27, 2009
In each of our lives God will place a vision, a vision for our life, business, marriage, careers, our kids and our relationship with Him. When the vision is cast in your life you will make a decision in that moment to accept it, ignore it or just walk away. Let me say to those who accept the vision that God has placed in your life, your commitment to that vision will be tested. You will then be asked the question, “Are you a prophet to that vision or will you be someone who prostitutes that vision?”
If you are a prophet you will not compromise that vision for the sake of convenience or the easy way out. When you read about the prophets they were unflinching, unchanging and unmovable when it came to their commitment to God’s vision for His people. If you are a prophet, a guardian of the vision, you will forfeit your own agenda for His and you will be less concerned about being liked by people and more focused on Loving people (speaking the truth, because truth sets people free though often they may not like the truth.)
On the other hand if you prostitute the vision you will sell the vision off for 30 pieces of silver. You will sacrifice Love for likeability. It could be a business transaction which causes you to look the other way, it could be ignoring the red flags in your marriage because you want to avoid conflict, and your teen maybe doing, clicking, drinking, smoking the wrong things and you’re looking the other way. When one prostitutes the vision of God it not only affects you, but those God had intended you to impact.
Go after the vision God has for your life, and I promise you will never be the same.
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By Bryan | January 14, 2009
Regrets come in all shapes and size, some big, some small, and many larger then life.
So today whether you ruined your life with sexual sin, addictions you might have wrecked your bodies- in some way you may be hoping against hope that something this year can be the tipping point that will give you the courage to begin removing the regret that has been holding on to you for years.
We have a tendency to quickly say, give me the answer, but the answers we are looking for are not always found in answer form but in question form.
Ask yourself these questions about your regrets:
1) Was I where I should have been?
– Think about those regrets you have – those small, medium –supersized
Stupid, second best or sinful regrets and ask yourself where were you and follow it up with where should I have been instead?
- I shouldn’t have been alone in the car with that boy
- I shouldn’t have been in a dating relationship with someone with opposite prioritize because I was asking for trouble
- I shouldn’t have been on the computer late at night trying to get work done when there was no one around to keep me in check –never would I have seen what I saw and never would I have gotten hooked and ruined my marriage..
- I shouldn’t have been working late 6 nights a week while my wife was putting the kids to bed by herself – then there may not be this huge divide in our marriage and my kids
- I should have been instead involved in a church where there was deep community and accountability
- I should have been talking to that person about my problem with them rather than talking about them.
2) What did I get too close too?
3) What warning lights did I ignore?
I know nothing about cars, when the check engine light comes up I have 2 options 1) take it to a mechanic – because I can’t get under the hood it makes no sense 2) take a hammer to the dash and make sure that light never blinks at me again and many of us treat our conscious, provided by the Holy Spirit in that way – your just running rush shot all over the warnings God is giving you –
I know if we went back before the regret was even executed – I know that God had given you some kind of warning
- Student: parents gave you a warning – but you chose not to listen to them.
- You might have had a friend who gave you a heads up – but you didn’t like what they had to say and because you wanted to do what you wanted to do.
- I bet somewhere deep down inside of you , you knew but got the I don’t care attitude
What warning lights did I ignore?
4) Where did I pass the point of no return?
Living a life of no regret is impossible, but living a life of less regret is as easy as asking the right questions.
Further reading: II Samuel 11 – 12 The Story of David and Bathsheba
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By Bryan | December 12, 2008
There are a lot of questions regarding Christmas: Where did we get it? How do we know that what we have is accurate? How do you know that Christmas is about this baby in a manger anyway?
The more people I talk too about Christmas there seems to be a big question mark. Christmas is probably the most controversial date on the calendar.
- Headlines read: a Florida school cancels a play due to the word Christmas
- Christmas break has recently been replaced with a holiday break
- We no longer have Christmas trees but holiday trees
- Instead of hearing Merry Christmas we hear happy holidays
There seems to be a conspiracy out there to rid the world of Christmas. That just brings up the question, why does Christmas bring up that much controversy?
Think about it :
-nobody gets upset over Columbus day right
- nobody gets upset at thanksgiving right ?
- Valentines day , St.Patricks day
What is it about Christmas that is so controversial ?
I believe what makes Christmas so controversial is focused solely on what is placed in the manger .
The controversy of Christmas is about Jesus being born in a manger.
If we are really honest Christmas is really about 2 things:
1) Jesus
2) Us
If it is about Jesus the focus is about Him, but if it is about Us the focus is off of him and onto Us.
If Christmas is about Jesus we live our life one way, but if it is about Us we treat it entirely different. What I have accepted is that Christmas is about Him and Jesus knows it is about Him and rightfully so:
-because a star marked his birth
- strangers showed up telling of an angel proclaiming the messiah
-eventually wise men show up to bring him gifts.
It’s really easy for us to crawl up in there and say it’s about me.
What is Christianty all about?
Ever since Jesus there has been a battle of who would be the center piece ,who will get the focus , who will get the attention at Christmas.
Is it going to be Jesus or us it can’t be both.
If we focus on Us, we blow right past Christmas and can’t believe it’s over, but if you focus on Jesus it’s something that does not end at Christmas it goes with us 365 days a year. When I think about Jesus it’s not necessarily the baby Jesus that is the controversial kid.
Baby Jesus is cute and cuddly, society is down with baby Jesus but I think it’s grown up Jesus that we have a problem with, it’s not cute, cuddly baby Jesus but its big Jesus, not baby Jesus laying in the manger but big Jesus hanging on the cross.
I think for some the problem with Christmas is that baby Jesus grew up
And made statements like :
-“I am the way, the only way to the father”, and when you make a statement like that watch out bullets are going to fly and you’re going to make somebody unhappy
Baby Jesus –cute
Big Jesus – controversial
So today we need to decide is Christmas about Jesus or is Christmas about Us.
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